it's just simply not like how i can just call my friends in the past, and if they're not free, call them up again next time. 

i'm considering whether i should just stop contacting my singaporean friends until i return to singapore. but though i'll be returning to singapore in june, i'm not sure if i'll be doing so in december, and face it, not contacting my singaporean friends for one year? i dun know what it'll do to the friendship. 

maybe the problem is just the inaccessibility. or maybe the problem sometimes is that i get so frustrated trying to find a suitable time to call that i want to give up. or maybe it's because i'm often in the wrong place when i can call my friends. i dunno. 

but i'm sometimes jealous of rachel. coz whenever she opens her email, there would always be this whole chunk of emails for her to reply to. 

I suppose i can wait until i come back to singapore and then start contacting all of my friends that i'd want to call. but this is such a lousy solution. must i be totally deprived of all of them until i go back to singapore? 

but seriously, the realisation that i have been pushing people to tell me when i can call them, and then not being able to contact them for some reason or another, it is seriously disheartening. 

...

i've made my decision. email me when you are free to answer calls, or when you want me to call you. otherwise, i won't bother calling. i'm serious about this. 

it's just too frustrating. 

i am not going to call anyone from now onwards. if anyone wants me to call them, please state the date and time that i can call and email it to my gmail. 

sorry, i know this is kinda hard and seems a bit demanding, but i'm seriously tired. 

3x3eunt.